I thought to myself. What in the world have I done?!
A wave of panic ran through me, and my heart began to pound as I stared back at the computer screen.
I couldn’t believe it finally happened. I’d exposed myself before the whole world—my life story, in front of any eyeballs that landed upon it. Despite everything in me saying I shouldn’t be sharing so much, I’d just published the first post on this blog. But there was no turning back now. Continue reading “4 Things I Learned from 4 Years of Blogging… And an Announcement!”
In June 2014, I lost my body.
Over seventeen hours, I watched in shock as my body grew a mind of its own, erupting in wild, bizarre movements I couldn’t control.
What started as innocuous twitches in my legs grew into full-body thrashes and twists and jerks over the course of one day. And then I realized I couldn’t walk, because every few steps, my legs gave out and sent me collapsing to the floor. Continue reading “I Woke up in a Body I Didn’t Recognize: Living with Involuntary Movements”
As graduation approached last semester, people constantly asked what was next. What did I want to do with my life? Did I have a job? Would I stay in the city? Was I going to grad school?
PANS relapse in August, I thought I knew all the answers. However, this disease returned not only to attack my brain, but to destroy all my plans.
Continue reading “Is This the Hardest Job in the World?”
This weekend, I’ve defied all odds; I’ve done what never should’ve been possible…
I graduated from college, Summa Cum Laude… While in a long-standing battle with PANS and Lyme Disease!
When I was first diagnosed, it felt like my life was a tragedy, and PANS was the ending. I was sure that it had completely ruined me, and pursuing my dreams seemed inconceivable…
Continue reading “I Graduated College with PANS, Lyme, and…. Highest Honors!”
They say that “school refusal,” or a deterioration in school performance, is a hallmark symptom of
Continue reading “Do These 7 Symptoms Make College Impossible?”
My life with PANS and a brain on fire! (cred: KC Green)
As I hurried off to class the other week, suddenly, I knew things were awry: it was that strange and all-too-familiar feeling in my head that foretells
a drop attack.
Continue reading “What I Really Mean When I Say I’m Fine”
Sometimes, you don’t get to wake up from your nightmare…
Lately, with each day that’s gone by, I’ve slipped farther and farther into the abyss of my inflamed brain.
I’m in a bona fide PANS relapse—there’s no denying it now.
As it turns out, I’ve had too much faith in my Lyme/co-infections antibiotic protocol.
Continue reading “Is This a Nightmare Come True?”
the first day I became ill, shame was a mainstay in my life with PANS… Shame about irrational fears that no one understood. Shame that I felt no control over my mind or body. Shame that I couldn’t do what I once could. Shame that I lashed out at my parents and said things I never wanted. Shame that I was spending more time with doctors than friends. Shame that I’d become a different person that I hated.
Continue reading “It Isn’t You: Defying the Shame of My Chronic Illness”